Winning Your Boyfriend Back - Making Him Want You Again
So he dumped you but you want him back... for one reason or another, you're not ready for the relationship to end. Luckily, there are some great ways to win back an ex boyfriend while he still has feelings for you. If you learn what they are, you can start being proactive (instead of reactive) about your break up.
"I think we're probably better off apart..."
Those words can hit like a sledgehammer, especially if you didn't expect your boyfriend to end the relationship. How can it end so suddenly? Doesn't he still love me? Can I get my ex back, and what's the best way to approach it?
Every relationship has a beginning and an end. If yours ended prematurely, you're probably looking for ways to win back your ex boyfriend's love, attention, and affection.
Maybe you've even tried a few things so far, but they haven't been working out. Maybe they've even been having the reverse effect, of actually driving him away. If so, it might be time for a different approach.
But let's be honest: No one gets broken up with and moves forward without making a few mistakes. There are common errors when it comes to dealing with an ex boyfriend, and everybody makes them. The problem however, is that committing enough of these blunders can really put a dent in your chances of fixing your broken relationship.
That said, if you're willing to recognize these mistakes and go forward with the right moves? You can easily win back your ex boyfriend before he moves on to another relationship.
Don't Chase Your Ex Boyfriend Beyond The Breakup
By far, this is the most common mistake women make. The minute he let go of you was the very same minute you started trying to win him back... and this is a major problem.
Right now? Your ex wants to be left alone. There's nothing you can say that will change his mind, and nothing you can do to convince him that he's making the wrong decision. Later on? There will be plenty of ways to get him to reflect on that decision. But right at the moment, any push you give him will only push your ex boyfriend away.
Keep in mind there is one critical opening move you need to make at this point. Once youv'e accomplished that however, the best thing to do is sit tight.
Stop Contacting Your Ex After He Dumps You
Unwanted contact will poison the chances of you and your exboyfriend ever getting back together. The more you call him, text-message him, and email your ex boyfriend... the faster he's going to run away. He might even be writing or texting you back, just to respond politely or even make small talk. But he's doing those things out of obligation to your past relationship, and probably only to soften the blow. He thinks he's letting you down easy, but in reality you're only using such contact to lead yourself on.
Avoid Kissing Up To Your Ex Because You Want Him Back
How many times have you apologized and told your ex that things will be different? Probably lots. However, the message you're really sending here is a very different: "I'm desperate. I'm needy. I'll do anything to get you back."
That kind of stuff is good for your ex boyfriend's ego. It ratifies his decision to dump you, and makes him realize he's doing the right thing. Knowing that you're still in love with him would be one thing, but seeing you throw yourself at his feet? Who wants to date someone like that?
Stop Thinking Only About Your Own Feelings
When a guy breaks up with you, all you can think about is you. This whirlwind of sadness and longing can cloud your vision, making you obsess only over your own feelings.
Instead, you should be trying to understand how your ex boyfriend feels right now. You should be looking for signs that he misses you, and if those signs aren't there you should be working to make him miss you. There are many ways to do this, but you have to stop mourning the loss of your relationship long enough to seek them out.
If you don't know signs and signals given off when an ex does miss you, you're missing a crucial step in getting back together. You can read all about them here.
Staying Out of Sight - Making Your Ex Boyfriend Feel Less Comfortable
Right after he dumps you, your ex will be looking back to see how you are doing. Allowing him to see you sad, upset, or sitting at home by the phone is NOT what you want. Pity might feel good initially, and you might think this will get him to feel sorry for you. In reality though? NO guy wants a pitiful girlfriend. Instead, you should be working on an opposite approach.
The end of your relationship should be exactly that: the end of any contact with your ex boyfriend (at least for now). Drop off his map for a while, and disappear from his social circles. For the months or years you were dating, your boyfriend kept tabs on you. Even though you're no longer his girlfriend, he'll still feel somewhat obligated to know what you're doing (and especially, who you're with).
Not knowing where you are or what you're doing will actually make him feel a little jealous...and you can use this jealousy in winning your boyfriend back.
Seizing Back Power After The Breakup
You'll never get your ex boyfriend back until you make him want you again. Until this happens, his attentions will always be focused elsewhere. Wait long enough, and your ex will start dating someone else. That's why it's important to get started right away on the path to winning your ex back.
When your exboyfriend ended things between you, he essentially took control over the entire dynamic between you and him. To get him back, you'll need to swing some of that power back in your favor. There are some excellent methods you can use to get your boyfriend to start thinking about you again, and to influence him into reversing his decision. Learning these methods will be critical to your success.
Why Your Ex Boyfriend Is Still Emotionally Bonded To You
Perhaps your best weapon when it comes to getting your ex back? The emotional ties he still has to you. No matter how long you've been dating or what happened to break you up, there are special bonds formed when two people fall in love with each other.
Even if he broke things off rather abruptly, those bonds are still there. Your boyfriend will deny or hide these attachments for now, in order to keep you away from him.
The good news is this: there are subtle ways to draw out those feelings, and get your ex to want you again. It needs to be done carefully, and it needs to be done at exactly the right time.
Don't leave getting back together to chance! Closing your eyes and hoping for the best is NOT the way to approach your break up... not if you still care for and love the relationship you once had together.
